Burn Injury Resource Center

At home the memories of the kitchen would haunt me every time I walked by the kitchen. For months I would lean to one side when I walked because it would hurt to walk straight. I was afraid of taking showers and I was also afraid of hot water. I didn't want to get burned again so I would always take a bath. My mother would have to put cream on my burns and wrap me back up. Every time I took a shower someone had to be in the bathroom, so that I would not fall and open my wounds. Eventually we moved out of the apartment where my accident occurred. I attended eight grade which was challenging. My peers would stare and point at my arm, I felt like they was laughing at me. After a while, they got to know me personally. I overcame the stares and the looks, it does not bother me anymore. I am now 17 and I recently graduated High School. I showed everyone that I can do whatever I set my mind to. My family used to tell me that I can out of my shell. I've come out of my shell by being more open minded about my situation, talking to people about my experience. Not trying to hide my skin but letting others know that I am human too. I made a list of things that make me feel shy, uncomfortable or withdrawn. I tell people who are curious about my burns, that I am proud of the young woman that I have become. I know that I am beautiful inside and out and that is all that matters to me. Knowing that I respect myself plus everyone else around me there is no stopping my will to strive for the best. Being burned is not just skin deep it affects your personality. Just learning to cope with it is the hardest part. Some move on and some don't. I moved on. I didn't want to be sad all the time or fell pity. There is still a life out there and I plan on living it. In fact, I start college in the fall.

When I got home I had to get use to being there. I needed my mother to change my bandages. I attended a barbeque with friends down stairs from my grandmother house. I didn't stay very long because my back was hurting me. My shirt was stuck to my back and I could not remove the shirt. Unfortunately I was re-admitted to the hospital. The second time being there was easier than the first time. Technically it was still stressful being back in a place I was trying so hard to avoid. The only thing that needed to heal was my back. So they put a certain type of patch that went around my whole body. The patch contained some kind of medicine. The nurse never told me that I would constantly feel sharp pain. When I was in the bed I couldn't move a certain way because of the pain. The second time in the hospital I stayed by myself. That didn't bother me because I needed some time to be alone to think about how my life would be. I would read books to keep my mind off the pain. Sometimes I thought about how being burned affected my family. When I came home I still had to attend weekly visit to the doctors, physical therapy and home school. That's when they gave me my JOBST suit. A JOBST suit is a custom pressure garment. I had to wear it 23 hours a day, only taking it off when I took a shower and putting moisture on my burns. The type of lotion I used was Lubriderm. I received summer school because I had to constantly be watched. That was hard because it was just the teacher and me. But luckily I passed through out all of the pain I endured. Seeing people just like me made me feel like I was not alone. My doctors recommended burn camp so that I could meet other patients like me. Connecticut Burn Camp was life changing. I never knew that so many children were burned. Even the camp counselor shared the same experience. That was the first time I wore a bathing suit in front of friends. No one judge us because we were all burned or scared. We always asked each other to share out stories. I plan on being a camp counselor when I turn eighteen. I want to give hope to other kids and let them know that they get through this tough time.

The surgery was for a skin graft where I had 3rd degree burns. In surgery the doctors used a metal medical object so that they could peel the skin off from a healthy part of my body. Then the graft would be placed on the part of my body that had 3rd degree burn. After the surgery I had to stay in bed for a whole week which was so uncomfortable. They would monitor the amount of food I ate every day to make sure that I was eating the proper amount. Going to the bathroom in the pail was horrible. Depending on others was hard, because I was 12 years old; I was a big girl and not a baby. I felt like an angle with one of her wings cut off, I could not fly. But I always held my head up. While in the hospital I attended therapy, which was very difficult for me. I had to move my right arm so that my joints would not be stuck. Trying to lift my arm over my head or reach for a certain object was challenging. I played games with the nurse but I would have to put my left one behind my back and play with my right hand. Because I part of therapy was to stretch my right that was burned arm. Playing with just my right hand was good exercise therapy. Each day I got one step close to recovery. Stretching my back to loosen up my muscles brought me to tears. I told myself that I would never stop pushing myself. When it was time for me to leave the hospital I was still kind of scared to go out into the real world. To prepare me for discharge the doctors set me up with a psychologist. I talked to her about everything. I worried that I would not be accepted in school. I felt like no one would like me because I was burned, I became depressed feeling guilty, thinking that it was my fault. The psychologist insisted that I tell my mother that I was glad it was me instead of her. The psychologist came to see me in the hospital. She knew how I felt about people starring at me. But I knew that everyone was going to look at me different. She prepared me and gave me more confidence about myself. A few days later I got to go home the burn unit thrown me a going home party. I was ready to go home and be with my family. I helped my mother pack all my belongings. I knew I could not be in the sun so my mother brought me a jump suit. I was starting a new chapter in my life as a burn survivor. I knew I was ready for the new challenges that awaited me.

The new room was kind of an eye opener, because I could see everyone coming in and out of the hospital. I was pleased to see other people leaving the hospital, seeing others leave kind of gave me strength to get well. A challenge that I faced was learning how to walk again. My legs were swollen. I struggled to get out of bed to walk around the hospital. There was a play room and every morning I would have to practice walking. I had school in the play room where I met a few children that were burned. My sisters and brothers were coming to see me, I had the opportunity to walk and greet them in the play room. They couldn't come into my hospital room because they were too young. I was so sad, because they didn't want to touch me. I didn't understand why they were scared of me, I was their family. But I didn't blame them, they were too young to understand. But we did make a jewelry box together which was fun. I got to paint it pink and blue. My family had to come into the room with scrubs and gloves on, so that I would not get an infection. My family would come and see me all the time, they brought me flowers, food or just show me how much they love me. They were so supportive, no matter what they were at the hospital. My grandfather told previous to the accident, my mother went to a man who told her that something bad was going to happen to me. We prayed after the accident that I would heal. Even my friends called me just to check up on me. My mother was in the hospital with me nonstop but she needed a break to go home to my brothers and sisters. I would have bad dreams about the accident and wake up crying. I was so scared one night that I asked one of the nurses if he could stay with me in the room until I fall back to sleep. His name was Dr. Love. He taught me how to be strong. He would always say never give up no matter what you do. I appreciated everything he did for me. That night the doctors called my mother and told her that I needed a blood transfusion. She did not know that I was having surgery right away.

My mother was in the ambulance with me. The ride was so bumpy and confusing. I started feeling pain on my back I did not know what it was. I told the paramedic what I was felling. She lifted me up a little so that she could see what was wrong. While doing so my mother started crying. To this day I don't know what she saw but I have an idea. They took me to Cornell Hospital where I was admitted to the burn unit. When I arrived at Cornell they took me into an emergency room where the doctors would remove the covers. I hated that because every time they remove the covers I would look down to see my body. I had what looked like water blisters on my body. The doctor told my mother that I was burned over 36% of my body. They were getting me ready to remove the dead skin. For some reason I was so sleepy and all I wanted to do was sleep. When I woke up all I wanted was food, and luckily my mother brought food for me. Seeing myself in bandages made me feel sad. I really didn't know what happened to me. I could not recall the accident at that point in time. All I knew was that I was feeling pain everywhere. It felt like pins were sticking in me. They put me into a room for seriously injured patients. I was in the ICU (intensive care unit). I was washed daily to remove dead skin in a room that was called The Tank. I hated the Tank, you would have to get two baths a day. The one in the morning would be in the Tank and the one at night would be in your bed. They would remove the bandages and scrub at my burns. I would scream to my mom and tell her that I don't want them to touch me. Begging her to tell them to stop, "mommy please don't let them touch me". It got so bad to I was asked the doctors if I could wash myself. The water came out full blast, I would be freezing cold when they were done. Heading back to my room, I would be shivering asking for more blankets.The doctors moved me out of that room a few days later.

My mother moved our family to New York in search of a better life. It was stressful living in New York, We had to go to a shelter to find a place to stay. Seeing my mother struggle was really hard for me and my brothers and sisters. My mother has six kids, with me and my twin brother being the oldest. We never really understood why my mother left Georgia, and we never asked. Our very first apartment in Brooklyn was not what we were use to. It was only a one bedroom apartment. I had to share a room with my brothers and sisters. We had been in the apartment for about a month when this accident happened. August 14, 2004 will always stay in my mind as a reminder. My mother wanted to cook Sunday dinner for the family. She was boiling chicken on the stove. We were straightening up the house so that we could play afterwards. My little brother and I were told to clean the kitchen. While cleaning I opened the oven door and all I remember is the stove tilting forward and the pot with the boiling water sliding towards me. I fell on the floor along with the pot that fell on me. The water was very hot! As soon as it hit my skin I was screaming. I ran out of the kitchen and into the living room. All I could do was cry and scream. My mother called 911. They told her to put me in the tub and run cold water. Sitting there I was wondering why this just happened to me. Crying and shivering at the same time I heard the fire trucks and the police in front of my building. When they arrived upstairs they took me out of the cold water and then put me into a chair. My skin was wrinkled in certain places where I knew that I was burned. I remember telling the firefighters that I didn't want to die, I was crying for help.

After a burn injury many survivors think that it's the end of the world and that all hope is lost. They think that they will never be able to live a normal life again. Setting goals is important as it will help the survivor to return back to the society and living a normal life again. A survivor should start by setting goals that are achievable and are not too hard and not too easy to achieve. Start with the easy goals and take small steps, one at a time. These steps will build up and you will be amazed later at what you have achieved. Have a plan to achieve the goals and don't let setbacks prevent you from progressing. Reward yourself after accomplishing a goal no matter how small the goal was. Continuously assess the progress you are making toward achieving each goal and see what steps are needed to reach your next plateau. After achieving each goal you will feel empowered and this will create positive feedback and enhance self esteem. With time you will see and feel the power of accomplishment and how this will speed up your recovery.

From the book "I will not be broken" by Jerry White.

Survivor X was disabled during the civil war that took place in 1978 in Eritrea. In the beginning he was saying "Now my legs are injured, what is going to happen to me?" But this didn't keep him down. He quickly got rid of these thoughts because he realized what happened to him, has happened already and he can't change the past. He stopped thinking about what happened to him and instead started thinking about what he can do. He started thinking about going back to work and taking control of his life, because if he doesn't do that, nobody is going to do it for him. All the bad thoughts that were in his mind were gradually diminishing until they were completely gone.

He now takes care of his elderly mother, and helps cultivate the land for elderly and challenged people in his area. In return for working their land, he shares the produce with them and also get to keep a share for himself. Survivor X doesn't see himself as a challenged person because he was able to work and give back.

There is a purpose in life for every person and no matter what happens in life, every person has to dust him/herself off and stand on his/her feet. It may not be easy in the beginning with all the physical and emotional trauma associated with burn injuries but no matter what you are going through, it won't last forever and you can choose a fresh start whenever you decide to. So it's your decision to change your life and start living your life again. Don't stick to the past, live for today. The good old days will not return again but the days ahead of you may be better than these old days.
The important thing after a burn injury is that you are still alive and you can rebuild your life. Set a goal and don't let the pain from the injury set you back from accomplishing your goals and dreams. Don't let negative thoughts seep into your mind because they will have a negative effect on you and will pull you backwards. When you are in pain, reach out to friends and family as they may be able to help. Make the best of each day in your life and leave the past to the past. Fight back with a positive attitude and a strong will.

Survivor X was living with his wife and two daughters and supporting them by working as an administrator when civil war erupted in Ethiopia. Everyone was asked by the government to fight even those without military training. Survivor X went to fight and while he was on patrol, he was beaten badly and shot thirteen times by revolutionaries. As a result he lost his arm all the way to the shoulder and nearly bled to death. The survivor recalls that the nurses didn't dress his wound as they thought that he wouldn't survive, they just were watching him die, but he survived. When he returned home, his wife told him that because he was an amputee, she couldn't live with him anymore and left him taking their youngest daughter with her. He was soon living on the streets because his savings were confiscated when a new government took over in Ethiopia.

Despite what he has gone through from hunger, disrespect, constant abuse and fatigue, he didn't give up. He was told about survivor corps by another war survivor he met. The survivor joined a support group for survivors and got connected with one of the partners of Survivor Corp to receive financing and training to operate a small business selling dry goods from a kiosk. The survivor with this business was able to rebuild his life; he says "I became strong emotionally and psychologically. My income also increased. I started to live independently. I respect myself, and now, others respect me as well." The survivor now peaks with people without disabilities telling them not to judge people with disabilities without knowing them, they are just like people without disabilities.

From burn survivors throughout the world

Survivor X was living happily with his wife and his three boys. On one day in May while he was alone at home, he was trying to clean his yard and garage from the litter that had accumulated during the winter. He lived in a rural area that allowed to incinerators to burn trash. He started a fire with trash from the yard and as he started to clean the garage, he collected boxes and papers and placed them in the fire for destruction, there were several empty oil containers, somehow he picked a full container of injector cleaner and as he placed it in the incinerator it exploded in his face.

He remembers seeing the skin melt from his fingers as he was trying to put down the fire from his face. When the fire was out, he went inside the house and called 911, they arrived after 5-10 minutes. He was taken by an ambulance were he passed out. In August he was brought out of the drug induced coma and he was allowed to go home at the end of September.

He suffered third degree burns over 48% of his body from the waist to his eyebrows. His nose was burned away and one ear was completely gone as well as most of the other. He lost one eye because of scars covering the pupils; his vocal cords and larynx were damaged because of the flame inhalation. He has battled for seven years with polyps in the larynx affecting the amount of air he inhales. He lost all his fingers and thumbs and had the large toe of his right foot removed and placed on his right hand to give him an opposing grip. He has ongoing surgeries for reconstruction and polyps. The surgeries are not as frequent, but at this point he doesn't see an end to the surgeries.

The survivor says "for me the most important asset I have had in recovery was my family. They have been there with help and encouragement and most of all love". He is not the same person now. He learned tolerance, patience and compassion. He also says" the ability to laugh at ones self when things are not going well may mean the difference between being a survivor and being a victim. The road to a happy life is a lot shorter for the survivor than for the victim".

From the book I Will Not Be Broken by Jerry White.

After a major trauma, many think that it's the end of the world, that everything has gone and that there is no point of living anymore. Life will continue. Choosing life means trying to forget about the past and deciding that you will not to be held hostage. Life has many good things to offer and all bad things will be memories. Willing to try, thinking positively and looking always forward toward the future will give you the strength to move forward. Taking small steps at a time are key and results will be amazing. Every survivor can be an inspiration to others of what can be accomplished if you set your mind to it and never give up. Most burn survivors can return to a productive and healthy life.

A woman whose husband was disabled in a civil war, as he was trying to help a fellow friend, although living in extreme poverty, and her husband's difficulty finding work, still she sees that they are living a happy life. She says "I am here living. We are missing a lot of things, yes, but we can live like that.. What belongs to love is love and whatever this poverty in our house, we are living according to our means with our three children here at home".

From the book "I Will Not Be Broken" by Jerry White

No matter what trauma you are exposed to, you have to face the fact that it happened, that it is in the past and you can't change it but what can be change is the future.

When the writer was in the hospital after losing his right leg in a landmine explosion, when he had to wheel himself down to the lunch hall during the recovery time, at the beginning he didn't appreciate that he was the one who is doing that. He would think to himself "don't they see the bloody stump?". But he did it and wheeled himself. When he reached the lunch hall he met a lot of people who were exposed to a different kind of trauma. He remembers an old guy who had been in the hospital for months going through rehabilitation having a prosthesis above his knee, telling him "don't worry you'll have your own fake leg one day". These people helped him to get through a very difficult time.

Being in the hospital, Jerry had to face the fact that he lost his leg and he had to deal with it. He started to appreciate his stump. He had six months of rehab to go through. The staff really helped him. If the staff was too sympathetic or pitying, he would probably have sunk into a funk, Jerry says.

People react differently to trauma, some will have intense emotions, some will react with denial, anxiety, frustration, guilt, anger, hopelessness, depression, etc. Dealing with these feelings is the way to get over them and proceed to recovery. Feeling self pity is normal but when it progresses it will lead to negative effects on the survivor. At one point a survivor has to stop feeling self pity and start to move on with life by accepting the facts. For the writer, the key to preventing self pity was outing it. Every survivor has the options and choices to change his/her life to the better by focusing on the things that they have and the things that they can change and do rather than focusing on what they lost or can't change.

From the book I Will Not Be Broken by Jerry White.

Humans are social in nature and can't survive without communication and socializing with others. Some people isolate themselves and retreat into a shell after being exposed to trauma thinking that they are protecting themselves. Reaching out to others and finding people who can understand what you are going through is essential. Surprisingly strangers that we don't know can be of great help and support to us while people we are close to may disappoint us. There will always be people who are willing to help and support us and they are always there when we need them.

The writer benefited a lot from social support while he was in the hospital in Israel after stepping on a landmine. This accident led him to lose one of his legs; he said "with so many people coming and going, it was clear that social support-a primary integrant for overcoming crises-was not missing from my life". Most survivors' testimonies that the writer interviewed were "I would never have made it through without my family. They saved me during the darkest moments. I am closer to my family now, after my accident, than before".

At the time of crises most people need support and it's part of the survival process. Some reach to family and friends while others reach out to god praying and asking him, we need someone, anyone out there to understand what we are going through.

Successful survivors are those who reach out and communicate with family, relatives, friends and support groups in order to get over the loneliness and isolation that accompany the tragedy. It is amazing that many times the inspiration of another survivor, a family member's help, a new relationship or a prayer is all that is needed to make a great change in the survivor's life. You have to be willing to reach out even if you don't want to because the results will be surprising and one day other survivors will reach out to you for help and support.

From the book I Will Not Be Broken by Jerry white.

Some people stay victims which is a type of defense mechanism that follows trauma. Sympathy is welcomed at time of need but some people continue to invite that sympathy because it is comfortable. Every survivor eventually has to take responsibility for his/her life and break this habit of victimhood.

Saying things like "if only I return back to the past to make this right" or "if I didn't drive the car on that time", if only so and so hadn't happen and so on will not change anything and will keep you attached to thoughts that will pull you in the darkness of the past. People who can't let go of their Victimhood will not be able to think positively, take positive actions or relate in a healthy way to others. They will not participate in daily life in an effective way.

You have to make choices to nourish the survivor in you and others. Finding your inner thriver and ignoring your inner victim. By tracing how you think and speak, you can climb out of victimhood. Try to do things that you like such as listening to your favorite songs, donating money to charities, volunteering charity work or other things that work best for you which will help you to find your thrive within you.